Uno Duos Tres

Happy Uno
Today could have been perfect. It could have. My morning started with an appointment with a media agency called Mind Share as they handle the accounts of Maxis. Met up with an individual, lets just call him “Terry” (That’s his real name; I don’t even know why I am doing this nonsense). Terry is in charge of Maxis, a telecommunication company that has 6.6 million customers. Not too shabby since they own about 70% of the market share. Anyways, we started talking and all the idea that I pushed to him, he did not succumb to my persuasive persuasions. Tried to sell him the concept to advertise to promote Blackberri. Apparently, due to the emergence of a particular technology called 3G, Blackberri is actually becoming obsolete. God damn 3G. Strike one. Second concept, promoting the use of mass SMS. This is where I told Terry that hypermarkets, supermarkets, restaurants, cafes… could actually use this service to inform their customers and potential customers about the promotions that they are having. Maxis would prefer to deal with this idea using a more straight forward method and maybe one of the most traditional way of marketing; face to face dealings. Shit, why is he throwing so many objections at me? Strike two. Third and possibly my last step. “Terry, advertising whether we like it or not, besides promoting a new idea, concept or product, it’s main purpose is for branding and imaging. Although Maxis no doubt is a big player, Maxis cannot overlook the importance of a continuous campaign that will tell everyone that Maxis is the leader, the alpha male, the dominant one.” And dear Terry said, “Tell me Charles, who does not know what 012 is?” As you would have guessed, strike three.
“Terry, I have a way that could make all the users of this guide to see your logo every time they make a reference on this guide; take the bookmark. The first page that they will turn to will be where the book mark is and the first thing that they will see is actually Maxis. The bookmark cannot be removed and so rest assured that it would be there as long as the directory is there.” “Ok, give me a good price and I will put it through to MAXIS.” *KACHING*…. Fucking jackpot. (At least there is hope)

Happy Duos
“Charles, have you ever considered working in a media agency?” (Why does it seem like I have heard this before?) “Yes of course, I have a passion for advertising now that I have seen the process and what you guys do. I know that I do not come from an advertising background but the passion is developing and I really look forward for a chance to work as a media planner.” “Let me make a call. My Maxis department is full, I will ask my colleague if he needs fresh blood, he deals with the Astro account.” (They have Nestle as well and therefore they are the biggest advertising agency in terms of budgets in Malaysia) “Hello Rahul, …….yadda yadda……..yadda yadda…… ok…. yup…..bye.” I did not really pay attention to his conversation as I was trying to hide my joy as I do not feel wanted very often and so every time that I do have the chance to have that feeling… oh so sweet, savour the moment. Terry then asked me if my company screens my e-mails, I said no and he said that he will send my particulars to his colleague and then he would call me and we would chat over a cup of coffee. Sometimes it is hard for us to choose, should I take the Mocha Chocolatta Frappucinno or a strong latte with four shots of espresso? Choices, choices.

Unhappy Tres
It is only natural for everyone to love a happy ending. I am close enough to smell the commission for the Maxis $22,000 deal. I got another job offer from an advertising agency. (Both are great advertising agencies… one of the best of the best, maybe not the best but one of them). A person dear to me asked me if I would be interested to go to a gathering that consists of different members from different industries. It’s good for me to know more people who could possibly be future clients, associates, etc, so why not? Out of kindness, I asked my director if he would be interested to go and have a look, he very politely declined and as I was walking away and he walking to the exit, he asked me about the Maxis meeting. I told him all the details and then he said that I should drop the account as he knows the marketing head in Maxis and it would be easier to deal directly with her. FUCK YOU… I worked so hard, making so many calls and finally getting an appointment with a big client, doing research to find ways to sell the product to him, and when everything is almost finalized, you take it all away from my hands?

“How dare you try to take what you didn’t help me to get,
Fucking bitch I hope you fucking burn in hell for this shit.”

-Eminem-
Cleaning out my closet.

The line just popped up in my head but how appropriate the way it fits in to the scenario. I hope I get the new job fast and so I could throw him the letter but before that, I would fight for what is mine and the account belongs to me. He did teach me a lot of things and for that I am grateful and respect him. Maybe he really wants to close the deal quicker but he really has to know that I spent nights awake to do my research. He helped me grow in terms of confidence and the way I present myself (in front of clients anyway) and maybe that’s the reason why I got some new job opportunities.

I really need to get some rest. I just had two bottles of SKOL and my eyes are already failing me. What’s happening to my immunity against alcohol? I am so tired. After work and late nights, I had to go for my Japanese language class today. Tomorrow would be my mandarin class. I always wonder why I was so eager to experience working life when I was in school. Maybe it’s the gratifying feeling you get when you know that you are more independent, that you spend what you earn, the satisfying feeling when you close a deal no matter how small. You feel victorious because you somehow managed to influence someone else to heed what you say. Oyasuminasai tomodachi, Jya matta.

Of Work, Car and Dog

The past few days really wore me out and I am feeling extremely exhausted. I guess that work never stop once you started and when you pick up your momentum, you know it deep in your gut that if you do slack off, you will be sliding down. Woke up this morning to the sound of my Samsung ringing. The number displayed was unfamiliar to me. “Some friend calling me with their office phone,” I thought. It was one of my clients, calling me on a Saturday morning and asking me to draft them a proposal. It is a good thing but there are some privileged individuals who do not have to work on a Saturday, I guess I was wrong. As I said, work never stops. Travelling is starting to take its toll on me. My clients revolve around manufacturers and therefore the places that I need to go are extremely far, at the far end of Klang Valley at least.

There are some anger in me that desperately needs venting out but for this case, I have no idea at all as to whom I should lash my fury at. Let me draw the picture for you. After a long day at work, I walked for about five minutes to my car, unlocked it, sat in and the thought of getting home for some rest made it all the happier. I started my engine and locked the door, in a city like KL, locking the door would be the first thing that everyone should do once they get in the car. I drove away and the sound from my speakers sounded fuzzy. “Oh shit, did I just fucked up my speakers?” I thought to myself as I have always loved to blast it in the morning, it wakes me up. I switched the Pioneer to play my Rasmus CD and it was crystal clear. What was wrong? The answer soon came to me but I was hoping for the better. I reached home about forty minutes later, got down the car and as to no surprise, my car antenna was gone. Unscrewed from its place. I was angry but at no one in particular. Fine. This morning, my dad asked me as to who scratched my car. WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! I went down to check on my baby immediately and there were scratches on the passenger side. The worse thing is that it was done intentionally. I was freakingly mad. Some asshole disfigured my baby.

Suspects for the antenna thief and asshole who scarred my baby:

1) Some dickward who has the knack for collecting car antennas.
2) Some dickward who has got his antenna stolen and therefore looking for a replacement.
3) Some dickward who feel the adrenaline rush for stealing shits which are worthless to them but important to me.
4) Some dickward who wants a dildo but had no money to buy it.
5) A !@#$%^&*&^%$#@! who feels that my car made his inferior.
6) A !@#$%^&*&^%$#@! who thinks that vandalising others properties is still the “in” thing.
7) A !@#$%^&*&^%$#@! who thinks that I have parked in “his place” when it is a public parking area.
8) The fucking idiotic guard who feels that I am troublesome as I always wake him up to open the gate for me as I come home late every night. You are hired to guard and not sleep ASSHOLE !@#$%^&*&^%$#@!.

I seriously need to wash my car, after doing my proposal, after eating my lunch, after sleeping for another few minutes, after taking my shower, after showering my dog.
Dogs are so fortunate. I have a beagle which I named Aibo, not a suitable name because he doesn’t listen and act to my command. As his “MASTER”, I have to feed him, shower him, cut his nails, cook for him, pick up his shit. How I wish my workplace master will do the same for me. To all, happy mid-autumn festival. Stuff yourselves silly with mooncakes.

Fully Loaded

2 hours 38 minutes and counting down. My interview at OMD will then take place and I am already feeling butterflies in my stomach. This is not the first time that I am going for an interview but why do I feel so nervous? Is it because of the fact that this may be the big break that I am looking for? Fortunate, that would be what I would say to describe myself. The whole thing happened out of sheer coincidence.

I feel so much pain in me now. This time, it has nothing to do with anything emotional. Pure physical torture that I had to endure from the previous night of Futsal. My ankle hurts and I am going to limp to my interview. What's worse, I was in the toilet doing something of extreme importance and when I am done, I took an equipment that has a trigger that would fire jets of water when you press it, it is called "The Hose". The mechanism that provides "The Hose" with its ammunition, what we call "The Tap" is usually turned off, rendering "The Hose" powerless. I then positioned "The Hose" but not at is designated area and accidentally pulled the trigger. "The Hose" was loaded, apparently, "The Tap" was operating. Jets of water shot out, hydra laser beams, and finally made contact. The result was devastating. Blood gushed to my head and I could feel pain, same place but two seperate entities. To the person who did not disarm "The Tap", watch your back.

Going up?

These past two days have been great… no… I would say that these past two days had been fucking magnificent. Maybe it’s a sign that I am actually getting a new lease in life. Maybe the MAN up there is giving me loan of happiness but as long as the interest is not too high, I’ll play along and pay my dues. Well, the story goes like this… (sounds of harps, followed by me looking skywards, an image emerge from the clouds above me).

I was driving towards uptown to meet up with an Ad agency, Optimum Media Direction (OMD), that is in charge of handling Sara Lee’s account. Not being in the best form due to emotional mix-ups, I felt reluctant and just wanted to get the whole thing over with. Driving a Honda Accord, I proceeded to the basement parking where I immediately found a spot right in front of the elevator. “Maybe today’s not as bad as I thought it was.” I got down, checked the contents in my sling bag, locked the car and lit up. I needed something destructive to clear my mind. Half a Marlboro Lights later, “TING,” the elevator door opened, stubbed out my cigarette, “Shit,” I thought, “what a waste.” A couple of seconds passed, I felt a jerk as the elevator halted. Door opened and I was greeted by “VISITORS PLEASE GET YOUR VISITOR PASS AT THE SECURITY COUNTER.” “Fuck that,” I thought but got it anyway. Walked towards another elevator, my finger approached the button marked with the number 3, pressed it and it lighted up. Door opened, walked out and looked right, not here and then looked left, saw the reception desk, a semi-circle white desk which is like nothing that I’ve seen in other offices before. “This must be it.” I got in and asked for Angeline, sat down and stared at a giant plasma screen TV showing CNN. There was a cabinet with trophies and certificates inside. “Awards,” I thought to myself.
“Hi Charles, come with me.” Angeline looked busy as she led me to a meeting room. She offered me a drink but I said I was alright. We sat down and I asked her a few questions, she answered, then I introduced the directory to her and when all was done, we just chatted. She seemed very wise and practical as to what we should want in our life. I admire that. She then asked me if I had ever considered a career in advertising. She proceeded by saying that they are looking for a male staff to train and nurture him into the industry’s talent. She then said that if I was interested, she could set up an appointment with me and her boss. I felt flattered. Out of curiosity, I asked her about the male staff in that department. “There are none. There are only female staffs in this department.” Wow. That’s enticing. (Those allergic to bullshit, please refrain from reading the next sentence.) But being the gentleman that I am, I would never consider working there just based on that criteria alone. I am now waiting for the interview next Tuesday after work. Hope that everything will go well. Wish me luck.

Unsent Letter

It has been almost a week since I last posted. The previous week of my existence provided me with many revelations, mostly about my views and attributes towards life as a whole. I have always posted about how unhappy I am with my life and everything that revolves around it and I finally, I hope, understand why. First and foremost, I realize that I am no longer the Charles that I was a few years back. As I have stated in my previous post, I was blessed, or maybe cursed with the attributes that I have now. The worst thing that I realize that a person can feel in life is hatred towards himself. That is ultimately the point of no return. How can one succeed in life or in anything in that matter, if he does not love himself anymore, how can he even wish for people to love him in return if he himself does not. We are all strapped in, strapped in life’s never ending amusement ride. We move fast then slow, then up then down but one thing’s for sure, we never go backwards. That was what some one told me. “I won’t turn back.” I just wish to take this space in my blog to say a few things to the person who said those few words to me. That person actually said much more than that but it all boils down to those four words: “I won’t turn back.”

Dearest you,

I am sorry. I finally understand what I have put you through during those times. I have foregone your trust in me and worst of all, I chose to forego what was most important to me, you. I wake up wanting to call you, hoping that you would be awake to answer my call. I go to bed thinking of you, hoping that somewhere in your heart, you would be thinking of me too. Times have been hard on me but I doubt that it is even near the pain that I have put you through. I pass my day slaving at my work, making as many appointments as I can, going out and meeting people. It vacant my mind for a little while. Everytime I hear your voice, I see you in front of me. Listening to you hastily putting down the phone on me, I feel a deep void within myself. A feeling that I never thought that I would ever feel. A feeling called emptiness. I know that things would never be the same ever again and it would be a far cry from being how I want it to be. I just wish to thank you for being there at my highest and not leaving me when I am at my lowest. I wish I could do the same. I wish that I could do much more. I wish that I still have the chance to. May the best of everything always surrounds you and if at anytime, you need someone to hear you, to be with you, to help, comfort and support you, if you could not find anyone else to fend off your troubles, I will be here and this time, I promise that I will not disappoint you. There are many things that I wish for you to know, but I know that there are things that you no longer wish to hear. Take care, dearest you.

Sincerely,
-Charles-

Unsent Letter

It has been almost a week since I last posted. The previous week of my existence provided me with many revelations, mostly about my views and attributes towards life as a whole. I have always posted about how unhappy I am with my life and everything that revolves around it and I finally, I hope, understand why. First and foremost, I realize that I am no longer the Charles that I was a few years back. As I have stated in my previous post, I was blessed, or maybe cursed with the attributes that I have now. The worst thing that I realize that a person can feel in life is hatred towards himself. That is ultimately the point of no return. How can one succeed in life or in anything in that matter, if he does not love himself anymore, how can he even wish for people to love him in return if he himself does not. We are all strapped in, strapped in life’s never ending amusement ride. We move fast then slow, then up then down but one thing’s for sure, we never go backwards. That was what some one told me. “I won’t turn back.” I just wish to take this space in my blog to say a few things to the person who said those few words to me. That person actually said much more than that but it all boils down to those four words: “I won’t turn back.”

Dearest you,

I am sorry. I finally understand what I have put you through during those times. I have foregone your trust in me and worst of all, I chose to forego what was most important to me, you. I wake up wanting to call you, hoping that you would be awake to answer my call. I go to bed thinking of you, hoping that somewhere in your heart, you would be thinking of me too. Times have been hard on me but I doubt that it is even near the pain that I have put you through. I pass my day slaving at my work, making as many appointments as I can, going out and meeting people. It vacant my mind for a little while. Everytime I hear your voice, I see you in front of me. Listening to you hastily putting down the phone on me, I feel a deep void within myself. A feeling that I never thought that I would ever feel. A feeling called emptiness. I know that things would never be the same ever again and it would be a far cry from being how I want it to be. I just wish to thank you for being there at my highest and not leaving me when I am at my lowest. I wish I could do the same. I wish that I could do much more. I wish that I still have the chance to. May the best of everything always surrounds you and if at anytime, you need someone to hear you, to be with you, to help, comfort and support you, if you could not find anyone else to fend off your troubles, I will be here and this time, I promise that I will not disappoint you. There are many things that I wish for you to know, but I know that there are things that you no longer wish to hear. Take care, dearest you.

Sincerely,
-Charles-