A Blog With A Title

The life of a regular guy, going through irregular changes, looking for simple pleasures in life. Funny how seldom you can put simple and pleasure together. Everyone needs to believe in a GOD and I believe I can fill your believe. To you, I shall be GOD.

Friday, May 29, 2009

To fuck (up) or not to fuck (up)

One of these days, we know that we will look back on life and wonder if we made the best out of it. More often than not, we have our bites of regrets here and there, clouded with all those "what if" questions. Waste of time; yes. One should move forward; yes. What's done cannot be undone; yes. That is the whole point, time cannot be turned back and you have to live with every consequences of your every action and decision. On a very personal level, I fucked up countless of times but end of the day, with all the bruises and scars, I learn how not to fall again. 2 parts questions:

1) How do I know I fucked up?
2) How do I know I am not fucking up again?

Fairly simple actually, I know I fucked up because someone or something gets hurt or damaged. Also I have friends who are less than shy to tell me, "Charles, you fucked up.... big time." I love blunt honesty, not that I am a sucker for pain, I just love blunt honesty. The "How do I know I am not fucking up again?" question brings a more constructed answer as everything is progressive, from how I was to how I am. I consider myself smart, this might be the ego talking but it's true, I do consider myself smart and was never shy to admit it. Do not bother asking me to justify or give you 10 good reasons why I think so because, I am not even going to explain why I do not bother explaining. Back to it, who I was was someone who is who I am today minus the opportunities that have presented themselves to me lately. Opportunities which are life altering. So the question is, can you grasp that opportunity, that one chance that surfaces before it submerge and disappear? I succeeded in catching it and now, we work on it. I missed chances before, that was when I fucked up... I ain't gonna let it repeat, and now I know, at least this time, I'm not fucking up again.