The centurian post

Finally we are at the threshold of our hundredth post. With post number 100, I thought that I would either feel ecstatic or mirthless but much to my dismay, I feel nothing. Maybe there is so much more going on in my mind. Maybe my concentration is veered to something with much more importance. Life thus far have been really rewarding for me in garnishing my days with new experiences. My life, the way I have lead it up until now, have always been based on impulse. What I wish to do, I just do and the consequences of my actions have brought me much joy but accompanying that, I have had my fair share of unhappiness. For the past few days or so, I have been living my life in austerity, not wanting to meet up with people and chose to just stay at home and be alone. How often do you see me being at home on a Sunday? This post could either mark the end of a chapter or the beginning of the new but nonetheless, I have come to terms that no matter what this post may mean, it has given enough reflection of my life from the time I began blogging. There were stories of lost and defeat, there were stories of success and victory. I have traveled to many places in the course of the years and I have held different jobs and you guys have been accompanying me along my journey. Some of you left encouraging comments and some left slandering remarks but all is fine and all is forgiven. I have lived my life long enough to know that I am not as perfect as I thought I was. I have learnt to accept the fact that not everything goes my way and not everyone look at things from my perspective. I have learned to pick myself up from where I fall and I have learned that I have every right to celebrate my glory when my chance arrives. I have learned to believe and I am learning to trust. With everything going around with everyone, it is no longer easy for us to get a clear perspective of what we really want. Even when we are so sure of what we wish to have, what we choose to do with our lives, things may have changed due to the consequences of our own actions. We just need to learn how to live with everything thrown at us, be it good or bad.

My life's journey thus far got me many new friends. People have come and go in my life, some stopping for a quick acquaintance and some registered as life long friends. I know that I have my faults and I have offended many and it is now that I wish to extend my apologies to everyone that I have ever hurt in one way or another. I have not been the best of friend nor have I best of boyfriend nor have I been the best of anything just yet but I am trying. Everyone deserves a chance right. Someone special once sent a picture to me with a message which up until today, I keep it close in my heart. It reads "Think of all the things you'd miss if you didn't believe in trying again."

My life is at a crossroad on so many levels right now. There are so many choices that I will have to make. The right decisions will give me everything that I wish to have but the wrong move would cost me everything. That is what life is all about isn't it. Life is about decisions and not only that, it is about making the right ones. I have also come to realise that the right decision may not be the best decision for us but there are things that we must do, things which we must be able to let go for the better of everyone.

Final words from me in commemorating my blog's 100th post, thank you guys for being here and showing me your friendship, love and support all these while. I truly appreciate it. Each and everyone of you played a part in moulding me into who I am today. Be it the bitter me that you guys have seen, to the sorrowful me that you guys had to endure and finally this me. This me whom you guys knew long before my life was tainted with all things bad and certain good. This me who has lived through enough to see things through and make the best out of every situation. This me who is alive again. Thank you.